Today, I read a colleague’s email and felt convicted that I had not been kind to her during an interaction and could have done better. I then began to wonder what kindness meant and decided to take it to the Lord to help me understand it better.
I began to search for the meaning of kindness in the christian context and came across many blogs with different scriptures but this particular one caught my attention and ministered to me the most: https://www.desiringgod.org/messages/be-kind-to-one-another
The text was from Ephesians 4:31 and Ephesians 5:2 and it provided an awesome breakdown of God’s kindness from two perspectives. The first perspective is God’s kindness through the forgiveness of our sins and the second perspective is Christ kindness expressed in his love for us.
As believers in Christ, we are to demonstrate kindness by accepting God’s forgiveness and show it by forgiving others – Ephesians 4:32. So how do we do that? and what exactly is God’s forgiveness? First of all, God’s forgiveness includes him settling our sinful accounts. The bible says that we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God Romans 3:23. This means we all have a score to settle with sin and justly deserve punishment for all our sinful deeds. It also means that every sin committed will be justly punished or accounted before God. But God is so kind that he sent his son to die for us as a penalty for this sin as we are not able to account for it ourselves because of the love he has for us. This means that God’s kindness is rooted in love. So we can either allow Jesus pay for our sins by accepting the love he offers or we can reject his love and choose to pay for our sins for ourselves in the fires of hell (Isaiah 53:4-6).
Either way there is a sin score to be settled by us. Therefore, we who are believers should not hesitate or be afraid to give kindness in the form of forgiveness even to people who are undeserving because ultimately God settles all scores. As regards forgiveness of sin, we should not have a flippant attitude towards sin and at the same time should anyone need our forgiveness we should give it as wholeheartedly as we can. When we find it difficult, we should take it to God who can help us and bring us to a place or a point where we are able to let go of our hurt.
God’s forgiveness was costly and cost the life of his son, therefore, sometimes our kindness in the form of our forgiveness to others too can cost us too. It can cost us the chance to exact revenge on the party that wronged us as we might feel that if we take our revenge we might feel better or be justified. It can also costs us the opportunity to hold a grudge that we can use to our advantage in exerting our own revenge in a superior manner. So, as painful as it seems, we have to chose to leave our hurt at Jesus feet to enable us exhibit the kindness God expects from us. Why? because ultimately God is the real Judge who can genuinely punish us for our sins. In our power, we may not be able to exert punishment the way we ought to but God is able to do that if he deems it necessary. Sometimes, when we go ahead and exert revenge it is not as sweet as we would like it to be.
God’s kindness in the form of his forgiveness is not a farce. What do I mean by this? it means that we are not to claim to have forgiven someone and then still hold it in out hearts so we can use it to our advantage at a later stage, it needs to be real and genuine forgiveness. This does not necessarily mean we have forgotten the hurt, but it means that we do not let the hurt dictate our actions. This is not always easy but as we bring it before the Lord and leave it at his feet, God is able to do a work in our hearts that will melt away the hurt. Also it might not be instantly and can follow a process but as long as you are determined and focused on God he is able to perfect in us through his son Jesus and the Holy Spirit. When God forgives us, he forgives us completely Psalm 103:12 and he restores us. So we should also strive for real forgiveness from our hearts.
God’s love expressed in his kindness is undeserved, so we should not insist that people merit our love or kindness either. This means being kind to undeserving people because this is how we demonstrate that the father lives within us 1 John 4:15-17. Remember God causes the rain to shine on both the just and the unjust Matthew 5:44-46. In the end, with the help of the Holy spirit we will come to the realization that we should love our enemies and do good because none of us qualifies for God’s love Ephesians 2:7-9.
God’s love is holy and through the Holy Spirit he helps us to be holy too. Christ love in the form of the Holy Spirit helps us to strive for holiness. On our own, we are unable to be holy but when we become believers, the Holy Spirit comes and lives within us until the day of redemption Ephesians 1:13-14. When Christ died for us, he gave himself up so that he can sanctify us (Ephesians 5:25-27). Therefore the Holy spirit inside of us works on us and makes us strive for holiness to present us sanctified before God. This may not be driven by emotion, sentiment, avoidance of conflict. It may also not seek human happiness or worldly happiness but will stem from an earnest desire to please God.
Christ love manifested in his kindness is self sacrificial and self-denying Philippians 3:7-8. So with the help of the Holy Spirit, we can also be self sacrificial and self denying. This can bring with it great pain sometimes and anguish but we should not lose heart because the Holy Spirit will never let us do life by ourselves. On or own we are not able to embody these characteristics which is where Christ love and kindness comes into play in the form of the Holy Spirit as he will work in us and through us to do the (supernatural) will of God for our lives (Philippians 2:12-14). We might be able to try within our strength but that soon gives way because we are in out flesh which is why fellowship with the Holy Spirit is a must if we are to exhibit the fruit of kindness that originates from him, the giver of life.
Once again, I would like to invite anyone who is not a believer in Christ to come to him because he loves us and desires for us to know him too.
Simply pray this prayer: Dear God, I am sorry for turning away from you and doing things my own way. Please forgive me of my sins. I confess with my mouth and I believe with my heart that that Jesus died for my sins. I ask him to come into my heart and be the Lord of my life. Thank you Lord God in Jesus name I pray, Amen.
That’s it. If you said this prayer and believed, you are born again and the Holy Spirit will come into your life. Your life will never be the same again. Stay blessed.